Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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