that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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