im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
