i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
