We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
