OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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