She said her name was "party"
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
