i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
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