Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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