Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Holy sore nipples Batman
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Randomize
