Quick, to the slutcave!
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
