so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
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its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
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