i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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