So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
My underwear smells like fireworks.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Randomize