the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
23 People Confess The Trashiest Thing They’ve Seen In Person
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
19 Transgender People Reveal The First Sign That They Were Trans
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.