I didn't shave. On purpose
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Randomize
