don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Randomize
