on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
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