I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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