I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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