ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
Randomize
