it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
