Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Randomize
