Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(310): View more from California

i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.

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(310): i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details. http://tfl.nu/0mu6

Replies (4) Good night (689) Bad night (2154)
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(316): View more from Kansas

I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper

(785): View more from Kansas

He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.

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(316): I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper (785): He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not. http://tfl.nu/pqqj

Replies (32) Good night (3367) Bad night (1053)
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(314): View more from Missouri

Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.

(1-314): View more from Missouri

Man I wish I had been there

(314): View more from Missouri

Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.

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(314): Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours. (1-314): Man I wish I had been there (314): Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again. http://tfl.nu/g53a

Replies (11) Good night (2726) Bad night (603)
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(650): View more from California

i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!

(408): View more from California

Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...

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(650): i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner! (408): Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland... http://tfl.nu/1sp2

Replies (41) Good night (3420) Bad night (793)
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(253): View more from Washington

is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?

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(253): is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing? http://tfl.nu/rrvx

Replies (5) Good night (594) Bad night (2648)
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(716): View more from New York

I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?

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(716): I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone? http://tfl.nu/d362

Replies (8) Good night (1581) Bad night (2541)
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(618): View more from Illinois

I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.

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(618): I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed. http://tfl.nu/50l6

Replies (11) Good night (6926) Bad night (963)
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(206): View more from Washington

She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.

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(206): She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America. http://tfl.nu/8yw3

Replies (8) Good night (2129) Bad night (802)
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.

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(+44): I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness. http://tfl.nu/lp3m

Replies (5) Good night (1353) Bad night (539)
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(815): View more from Illinois

Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !

(779): View more from Illinois

You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.

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(815): Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him ! (779): You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right. http://tfl.nu/e8wh

Replies (7) Good night (1036) Bad night (728)
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(+61): View more from Australia

Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.

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(+61): Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night. http://tfl.nu/mvw7

Replies (6) Good night (2617) Bad night (419)
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(631): View more from New York

She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat

(1-631): View more from New York

SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.

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(631): She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat (1-631): SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT. http://tfl.nu/se9g

Replies (5) Good night (1332) Bad night (511)
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(305): View more from Florida

to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter

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(305): to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter http://tfl.nu/2ljl

Replies (5) Good night (554) Bad night (256)
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(601): View more from Mississippi

My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.

(1-601): View more from Mississippi

Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.

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(601): My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service. (1-601): Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar. http://tfl.nu/yh0y

Replies (1) Good night (926) Bad night (235)
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(616): View more from Michigan

So like, boobs.

(1-616): View more from Michigan

are you really going to start every conversation like that?

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(616): So like, boobs. (1-616): are you really going to start every conversation like that? http://tfl.nu/4tw0

Replies (3) Good night (595) Bad night (190)

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