what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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