Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
