i think my mom watched the whole time
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Randomize