Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
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