Texts From Last Night

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  (773): View more from Illinois

  Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian

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  (773): Help. Asians are flirting in front of me<div>(773): They speak asian</div> http://tfl.nu/664g
  Replies (16) Good night (1720) Bad night (2027)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?

  (773): View more from Illinois

  Responsible fail?

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  (907): Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior? (773): Responsible fail? http://tfl.nu/nxhx
  Replies (19) Good night (1452) Bad night (5425)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic

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  (240): No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic http://tfl.nu/pmgj
  Replies (23) Good night (872) Bad night (2918)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it

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  (773): I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it http://tfl.nu/9cts
  Replies (37) Good night (11404) Bad night (819)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?

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  (203): Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook? http://tfl.nu/084o
  Replies (16) Good night (3867) Bad night (1908)
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  (818): View more from California

  Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around

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  (818): Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around http://tfl.nu/awow
  Replies (9) Good night (3593) Bad night (1278)
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  (415): View more from California

  had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon

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  (415): had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon http://tfl.nu/bpcz
  Replies (8) Good night (3058) Bad night (914)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.

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  (519): We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet. http://tfl.nu/qx6i
  Replies (4) Good night (1050) Bad night (2261)
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  (574): View more from Indiana

  There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party

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  (574): There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party http://tfl.nu/2g1j
  Replies (5) Good night (2400) Bad night (649)
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  (864): View more from South Carolina

  she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual

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  (864): she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual http://tfl.nu/fkyx
  Replies (3) Good night (1373) Bad night (809)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.

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  (630): I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager. http://tfl.nu/yzyc
  Replies (6) Good night (1437) Bad night (541)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.

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  (614): I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together. http://tfl.nu/yozh
  Replies (6) Good night (1086) Bad night (719)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  "Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.

  (1-314): View more from Missouri

  When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.

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  (314): "Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high. (1-314): When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic. http://tfl.nu/714c
  Replies (2) Good night (877) Bad night (362)
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila

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  (267): At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila http://tfl.nu/iq3c
  Replies (0) Good night (329) Bad night (484)
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  (573): View more from Missouri

  I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..

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  (573): I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding.. http://tfl.nu/ukti
  Replies (5) Good night (424) Bad night (1046)

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