I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize