Who wears a wallet chain?!
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
Randomize
