the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
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