wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
