You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
It's blow job season.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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