No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize
