Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize
