My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
Randomize
