Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
