So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
