just come out here and I will go home with you...
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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