READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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