just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
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