we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Randomize
