Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
PANTIES FOUND
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