It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
