literally had 100 drinks last night.
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
