God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
