Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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