There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
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