I think i peed on brittanys purse
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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