I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize