The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
